After my scheduled check-up with my doctor and the lunch date with my mom, I gathered my things and started to head off to the train station. I decided to get on a train as it will be my fastest and most direct mode of transportation going church for Date Talk. And as I wait for the train in Roosevelt station, the gears started to turn. My alone time has started. I began to start my private conversation with God.

As the train approached, I found myself going back to that time when I do random escapades and ride trains going somewhere. That peace you get from traveling alone, along with the sense of new adventure and independence. Another side I learned to love as I add more years in my life, hoping I could do more in the future. My own dose of freedom. My own time with God.

I made myself comfortable in my chosen space near door number 2, I had sudden flashbacks of talking to Him in the stillness of an afternoon overlooking a rice field, under the dome of a billion stars, sitting on big boulders of rocks by the sea as I watch the sun set or the sun greeting the world a good morning, even at the time when I'm just sitting there waiting to get to my destination. This particular instance is not different from it. Looking outside the big window, watching the small houses and buildings, cars moving along in the traffic, I found my voice and the train of my thoughts started chugging through the tracks. It excites me.

I've been into different situations in my life, which varies from life-changing decision-making, faith-testing, patience gauge showing danger signs of emptying, heart-wrenching ones, and also the extremely saddening. Sitting on this corner made me realize, I may haven't made it this far if not by Him standing there beside me, straightening me up when I start to crumble and fall down. He calmed the storms that came in my life, carrying me when all of it weighs me down. He took care of the wild horses in that peaceful field, restoring it to its original state and at the same time made changes to it, improving it, strengthening the fields to be better once wild horses start appearing, again. And I was brought back to my corner seat in that train. I started to see it all, clearly.

The train, on the other hand, reminded me of the wild horses in the fields, too. They run fast, as if chasing time is all that they can do. I also thought that if one thing goes wrong, one wrong placing of the hoof or a simple crack on the track would mean accident. Though scared of the fast driving, if you get to trust the operator of the train, you'll start to calm down and you'll be rejoicing once you realize that you've got to your destination, safely. Again, God made me understand another thing.

Using that analogy, we sometimes get scared to what the future has for us or what the challenges in life would do to us once it is over, thinking if we'll get out of it alive or if we'll be able to surpass it. But the Bible mentions a lot of verses, saying that He will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5) and that you should have no fear for He is with you (Psalms 23:4). God is bigger than all the things that we may go through and all we need is to trust him. Yes, he loves us that much that He won't let us feel alone and sad. Just look around you, even your friends and your family's from God. See?

And as I stood up, readying to alight, I admit that I am smiling like crazy, too much overwhelmed with how He's been there in every single moment of my life. And that I got out alive from these challenges, all new, wounded and healing and stronger, a much better person from that one I've been before the storm, before the wild horses came galloping.

Another quiet moment with him and all I could say is that every single one of them is really worth it.

The Midnight Tea Party lasted longer last night (5 am) with pets keeping me up, always has their own way to wake me up just when I'm about to fall asleep. Extra slow, so much for feeling too sleepy, today.